My apologies to my small yet faithful group of readers; I've finally dragged myself out of the university library and off the beach, essentially the two places I've been finding myself lately, to sit down in front of a computer to update my blog! Let's see if I can get back into the rhythm of blogging regularly again!
In the United States, at least where I grew up, we tend to be somewhat cold when greeting people. We often shake hands or sometimes simply say "Hello!" when meeting someone new. Maybe we exchange a hug with a friend we haven't seen in a while. However, one of the first things I notice when traveling is how such greeting customs differ from place to place and region to region. Between exchanging words, hugs, all different forms of kisses, handshakes, bowing, waving, head nods, pats on the back, knocking fists, it can get a little complicated, before you add any gender, generational, social, and contextual stipulations as well! In many places, learning how to "faire la bise" ("make/do the kiss" in French) is an artform, and can get kind of tricky.
First off, in many places, it's not really a kiss. It's more like you touch cheeks while making a kissing noise, in many cases making sure the rest of your body doesn't touch. In Spain, for example, it's two kisses from the right to left cheek exchanged between two women, and between a man and a woman. Men typically don't exchange kisses. This is the norm for pretty much every time you meet someone or see someone you know. In Puerto Rico, the same rules apply, except just one kiss with the right cheek is exchanged, however I still catch myself giving two kisses here in PR every once in a while out of habit! Many countries in Latin America follow this same custom as well. Sounds simple enough, right?
However, when meeting and greeting friends from Greece, France and Brasil, and many other countries, make sure you offer your left cheek first, or you might end up in an awkward position where you either almost end up smacking lips or do this awkward dance à la when you come across someone on a sidewalk and you both try to let each other pass. But wait, there's more! In Switzerland, people typically exchange three kisses, L-R-L, and in France, the number of kisses can vary a lot depending on the region as well. Additionally, in some places like Italy, exchanging cheek kisses between to men is common, often accompanied with a pat on the back.
Although some people from the US might feel uncomfortable, I never really minded exchanging kisses. I find it gets rid of any awkwardness about meeting a new person. In other instances it can be a bit of a rollo, for example, when you walk into a room of 15 friends and have to exchange individual greetings with everyone, rather than in the States where one general "Hey everyone!" will suffice. Oh yes, and it must be repeated when you leave as well!
Then there's the added complication of being a foreigner. Sometimes you might go for the kiss, but they offer their hand to shake, knowing that it's what's common in the States. And what about meeting another foreigner in a foreign country? Do you follow the rules of the country you're in, or the culture of that person? Now all this kissing business isn't so black and white after all! In some instances, I've gotten away with hand shaking or not kissing everyone being a foreigner (mostly out of laziness, I admit).
And what about meeting another Unitedstatesian while abroad? With many girls from the States I've met who also live in "kissing countries", we end up exchanging kisses. But what about with the guys? Even more complicated, as sometimes it crosses some kind of cultural comfort line in certain instances. Most of the time, it ends up turning into a comical situation where nobody really knows what to do anyway! How about when going back home? On my visits home, I find myself going to exchange a cheek kiss with friends who are often taken off-guard by it!
Here's a somewhat funny clip in French (with English text in the "Comments" portion on the YouTube page) about how to faire la bise in France. See how complicated it can be!
In the United States, at least where I grew up, we tend to be somewhat cold when greeting people. We often shake hands or sometimes simply say "Hello!" when meeting someone new. Maybe we exchange a hug with a friend we haven't seen in a while. However, one of the first things I notice when traveling is how such greeting customs differ from place to place and region to region. Between exchanging words, hugs, all different forms of kisses, handshakes, bowing, waving, head nods, pats on the back, knocking fists, it can get a little complicated, before you add any gender, generational, social, and contextual stipulations as well! In many places, learning how to "faire la bise" ("make/do the kiss" in French) is an artform, and can get kind of tricky.
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| (Source) |
First off, in many places, it's not really a kiss. It's more like you touch cheeks while making a kissing noise, in many cases making sure the rest of your body doesn't touch. In Spain, for example, it's two kisses from the right to left cheek exchanged between two women, and between a man and a woman. Men typically don't exchange kisses. This is the norm for pretty much every time you meet someone or see someone you know. In Puerto Rico, the same rules apply, except just one kiss with the right cheek is exchanged, however I still catch myself giving two kisses here in PR every once in a while out of habit! Many countries in Latin America follow this same custom as well. Sounds simple enough, right?
However, when meeting and greeting friends from Greece, France and Brasil, and many other countries, make sure you offer your left cheek first, or you might end up in an awkward position where you either almost end up smacking lips or do this awkward dance à la when you come across someone on a sidewalk and you both try to let each other pass. But wait, there's more! In Switzerland, people typically exchange three kisses, L-R-L, and in France, the number of kisses can vary a lot depending on the region as well. Additionally, in some places like Italy, exchanging cheek kisses between to men is common, often accompanied with a pat on the back.
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| Number of kisses in France(source) |
Although some people from the US might feel uncomfortable, I never really minded exchanging kisses. I find it gets rid of any awkwardness about meeting a new person. In other instances it can be a bit of a rollo, for example, when you walk into a room of 15 friends and have to exchange individual greetings with everyone, rather than in the States where one general "Hey everyone!" will suffice. Oh yes, and it must be repeated when you leave as well!
Then there's the added complication of being a foreigner. Sometimes you might go for the kiss, but they offer their hand to shake, knowing that it's what's common in the States. And what about meeting another foreigner in a foreign country? Do you follow the rules of the country you're in, or the culture of that person? Now all this kissing business isn't so black and white after all! In some instances, I've gotten away with hand shaking or not kissing everyone being a foreigner (mostly out of laziness, I admit).
Here's a somewhat funny clip in French (with English text in the "Comments" portion on the YouTube page) about how to faire la bise in France. See how complicated it can be!
What do you think? Are there any different customs when it comes to meeting and greeting people where you are? Please note that these are just my observations based on the people I know; let me know if you have a different point of view!
